I AM OK... YOU ARE OK ???

By Sr. Linda

In a relationship, have we asked, if I'm OK and you're OK?

If this becomes part of our lives, then we can be a communications consultant, both for myself and others. Because the core of human relationships is, I'm OK and YOU OK.

One time, I pondered and asked myself, why each discuss ideas, me and a friend arguing frequently, so the conversation becomes stagnant, even we have to postpone the talks to make a decision, when in fact it can be completed at that time.

But when we talk about things related to feelings, we can talk for hours and feel comfortable.

What exactly is the dominant situation in us when arguing?

I'm trying to remember the incident at the time and finally made ​​a conclusion, that in fact we portray ourselves as parents (parent ego). Parents who dominate, control, follow the standards and rules to become tighter. When this character appears, then there is tension.

In interpersonal communication, there are 3 stages of ego, that is:

Parent Ego - characterized by dominating, over protective and loving, assertive and critical. This is illustrated by those who set the standards and rules for others.

Adult Ego - In this attack the problem rationally minded the cold. In the adult state information gathered, carefully analyze it, generate alternatives, and make a logical choice.

Child Ego - subject and accordingly, lawless, emotional, fun, or rebellious. Characterization by a very immature behavior.

In building relationships and communication, we need to recognize the role of each person before making a judgment, whether the parent ego, ego adult, or child ego. By understanding the roles, relationships and communications I am getting better. I'm OK and you're OK.